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Contact With ET Made in Arkansas

Contact Made with ET in Arkansas - SlightlyQualified.com

You know that moment: you’re walking down the street, or strolling into your office’s conference room to meet the new Grainger sales dude only to do a completely-obvious double take with the person’s face – either he/she was the ugliest son of a gun you’ve ever seen, and/or it was a Tommy Boy, chicken wing dinner moment: “Oh my god, what happened to your face!?” We’ve all been there, and in all honesty it can be hard to prevent because it is just so automatic.  Well do I have one of those moments for you, my faithful SQ Nation.  Who remembers the awesome, old school movie E.T. from the early 80’s?  I do – that’s when I first heard of Reese’s Pieces – and the funny pic below I thought was just priceless.  Thanks to the Internet, this real-life ET won’t notice you spit your coffee out all over her face, I mean computer screen.

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Marine on a Cross in Washington DC (Get Back)

US Marine Hangs on Cross in Washington DC in Protest - SlightlyQualified.com

The knife hands nearly came out at my laptop screen – okay, that was a joke, but seriously what in the world is this guy doing?  If you can’t tell from the disturbing picture above (all three photos below after the link), we have what appears to be a Marine/former Marine that has apparently hung himself (not around his neck – he’s just fine) by his dress blues in the heart of Washington D.C. in some form of religious and/or other protest.  What you do not see in these head-shaking images is every 1stSgt and SgtMaj in the world – in or out of CONUS – bursting at least three or veins as they try not to kill the first person that walks into their field of vision; heck, how can any Marine – former or active – not feel a little irked by these pictures?  I know I am, but I’ll hold the rest of my thoughts for after the jump.

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Cold In July Official Movie Trailer

Due in theaters in a little over a month on May 23rd, Cold In July looks like its going to be a thrilling winner.  While a good trailer does not always equate to a good movie, all signs are pointing to high quality after I watched this excellent official trailer which was released just a few days ago.  Most surprising however is that this film has a cast that is filled with relatively no-name actors, however there are a few faces that most of you will recognize.  If you like suspense/thriller movies, then this trailer – and movie – is definitely for you!  More after the jump below.

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Weird Video of the Day: Raining Food

Just like a car wreck, there are videos out there on this glorious Interweb of ours that once you start watching, you just can’t seem to pull yourself away from it.  It may not be the funniest video – heck you may not even enjoy it – but it sucks you in and just obliterates 1-3 minutes of your life that you may never get back.  Well, I suppose you could if/when someone invents a time travelling machine – no, Marty’s DeLorean and flux capacitor do not count – but I wouldn’t hold your breath.  Now if it starts raining food, then yes, I would hold your breath.  Ladies and gentlemen, I now pronounce today’s first inaugural weird video of the day, Raining Food – clear your schedule for the next few minutes.

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Advertising vs Reality: This Toddler Ain’t Impressed

Advertising vs reality: we’ve all experienced it, whether it was that glistening new cheeseburger you saw on that Sonic commercial last night, only to get a flat, depressing sandwich shoved in a bag by some pimpled kid on roller skates, or that new laptop with a supposed 12 hours of battery life, which promptly succumbs just two hours after you proudly unplugged it.  While false advertising is legitimately illegal, there are obviously ways of stretching the truth, from miles and miles of -50 sized white font at the bottom of car commercials, or having 50 million ways to interpret the definition of “all natural” on those granola bars you bought this weekend – companies know it, and so do we, the consumers.  Some consumers however pick up on this fact earlier than others, and in this toddler’s case, he’s already raising the bullshit flag.

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Trojan Condoms = Brand Name Fail

Trojan condoms are easily the most recognized, and according to CompaniesandMarkets Trojan dominates [US condom market share] with 69% of sales. (Source) No, you immature bastards, that is the actual, estimated market share percentage – calm yourselves.  But could they do any better – after all, there is still 31% of the market potentially available for the taking from the likes of Durex, the next biggest player?  Of course they could, and that’s likely what every Trojan senior executive has and should have been pushing for, but have they ever done an objective analysis on their own brand name – Trojan Condoms?  The good news is that someone already has – hit the link below for the full brand name analysis (and a laugh).

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World of Warcraft Wishlist

Remember Robin Williams’ rendition of the Genie from Aladdin? That was a great cast back in 1992. “Genie, wake up and smell the hummus!”

Well we’re alive and out of the lamp, so here’s our current WoW wish list.

First wish: Inta-queue for multiple toons. For example, if I’m in LFR queue on my pally, I should be able to queue as my mage or warlock. Because some queues are cresting an hour, and I may not want to kill an hour on my mage, but I may want to raid with him. What a great way to reward players who have sunk in that much time to multiple toons.

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Video: You Can’t Reason With Babies

You can’t reason with babies – you just can’t.  When it wakes up in the middle of the night screaming and wailing like a fire alarm, it simply is not going to stop until it gets what it wants: food, and/or attention from one or both of its parents.  There is no arguing, no reasoning, and definitely no negotiation (until they start understanding what certain foods and or devices (TV) do), which is why this brand new funny video above is so … funny.  You don’t have to be a parent to enjoy this one – we’ve all been around babies.  Enjoy the video – hit the link below for more!

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Ever Watch Someone Tear Apart A School Board Meeting? You Can Now

Just…Wow. It’s like…Man. They can only sit there and take it.

Here’s the context: About five years ago Common Core state standards came into existence, and one by one about every state in the US adopted them. Now, I’m a high school English teacher, so I can tell you first hand how this is affecting schools. Some teachers love them, some teachers hate them, but everybody is already sick of hearing the term “Common Core.” It has become a catch-basin term for wholesale rewriting of curriculum and, potentially, redesigning the school district personnel infrastructure.

Now, I’m not as up in arms over this as this student is, but I may be more vested. And if I was in this meeting, I’d be watching the body language of each and every school board member, because I know they’re going to owe the community a response on the heels of this verbal beat down.

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Energy Drinks We Like: Rip It Sugar Free

“Rip It?  What are you talking about – it’s an energy drink?”  Yes, it’s an energy drink, and that’s usually the confused response I receive whenever I ask one of my civilian friends if they’ve ever had one.  You see, it’s extremely rare to find one of these delicious sugar free energy drinks out in the American wild – and by wild I mean at truck stops, gas stations or convenience marts.  On the other hand, where you will find unlimited amounts of Rip Its and all their caffeinated glory is at American combat military outposts throughout Afghanistan.  While I had heard about the awesomeness that is the Rip It energy drink (I love the sugar free version) during our battalion’s deployment work-up, I wasn’t able to taste one until I touched down at FOB Geronimo in Central Helmand Province, Afghanistan, sometime in 2010.  All I can say is those tiny little cans (they have tall boys as well) made a big impression on my caffeine-seeking soul, and if you can find one here in the States, it will be well worth your journey. (Rip It Treasure Map after the link!)

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OEF Brothers & Sisters: What’s Our War Soundtrack?

So as I’m sitting here watching Forrest Gump and the awesome scenes from when Forrest enlisted and went on to Vietnam, it made me think about war soundtracks: Vietnam obviously solidified its soundtrack years ago through the countless movies that have defined it, but what about OEF?  What’s our war soundtrack?  For those out in SQ Nation that aren’t sure what OEF stands for – Operation Enduring Freedom – it’s the official name to the “War in Afghanistan”.  For that matter, OIF could be included as well in this conversation since the two wars completely overlapped.  I just posed this very question over in Reddit’s excellent /r/Veterans subreddit, but would love to hear the thoughts of our fellow OEF’ers (and OIF) here at SQ.

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